Drowning

The blue of the ocean turns to black
As day turns into night
Tonight the sharks will feast
On blood that was never meant to be

The water strokes my nostrils
Teasing
Laughing
Threatening

My eyes close and revel
In the feeling that has been there so many times  before
A gut-wrenching pain
A stab in the heart

All while putting pen to paper
Paper to essay
Essay to give, that will never return

The water swells into a wave
It comes crashing over my head
I inhale the salty water spluttering
My hand goes limp
My mind remembers

Jogging
Running
Sprinting
They ask for more effort
Tripping
Falling
Breaking

The waves pull back
Ready to watch the show
I look to my right to see a glint of white
Flashing like a blade in the moonlight
Murderous

A powerful fin strikes at my legs
Throwing me off balance
Scaring me
Scarring me
I wish deep breaths would work

A flash of white
So fast that the sound of it slamming down reached nearly a second later
She snarled

5 years old
I wanted to play the game differently
She didn’t
She kicked at me with all her strength
Never looked back

Another wave
Pushed down
Straight onto the shark

Air bubbles slipped from between my lips
Agony
Misery
Torment

Just starting school
Sitting together on the ground
Not moving an inch
Learning to be obedient
3 years old

The shark grabbed my leg and pulled
I grabbed at the water
Tried to kick free
Watched the last bubbles float from my mouth
But I didn’t drown that night

I’ve been drowning all my life

Sadhvi Swaminathan is an avid reader beginning her journey in high school. She has lived her life like a turtle, peeking out of her shell every now and again, yet always retreating back behind a wall of books and fantasies.

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